The Waiting Game

As I approach my one-year mark of therapy, my biweekly sessions have become more urgent than ever. This year’s defining moments included a career change, moving back home and building new relationships, all of which I’ve struggled managing. I’ve grown to appreciate the confidentiality and impartiality of good therapists, attributes seldom found in the average friend or relative. I’m more reluctant than ever to vent to friends out of respect for the limits grad school and other demands place on our time together. So, the 45 minutes set aside each week to discuss everything under the sun with my therapist are cherished. However, mounting responsibilities and pressing issues have made the wait between therapy sessions seem incredibly long and unbearable. Life’s woes don’t follow a biweekly schedule. Lately I’ve hit my therapist up asking for him to squeeze me in at his earliest convenience. However, my therapist is not available around the clock and therapy isn’t cheap. The thought of waiting two weeks to address and process unfolding circumstances sometimes feels unfair or even impossible. So, what do you do when faced with the dilemma of needing help with crises in real time yet not having immediate access to your therapist?

(Sidenote: I have already discussed some of my favorite coping strategies on my Instagram blog, but I haven’t discussed what things I’ve found most useful in times of crisis where immediate attention is needed. Of course, when dealing with situations where you feel as if you or someone close to you is facing imminent life-threatening danger/harm, you must contact authorities. Notwithstanding, here are some tools I have found more useful in non-life-threatening mental health crises.😊)

Hotlines/Text Therapy

This is an accessible and effective resource for anyone in crisis. Recently after experiencing suicidal ideation for the first time in years, I called the national suicide hotline. The conversation I had with the hotline volunteer was not an immediate fix. However, I was able to walk through the ordeal I was facing while the volunteer listened attentively. Their reassuring tone and willingness to hear me out helped me regulate overwhelming emotions. Being able to speak about what I was going through and receiving immediate validation was what I needed. At the end of the twenty-minute-long call they redirected my attention to what I could do to support myself for the rest of the day and week. From there I was able to able to tap into other coping mechanisms while awaiting my next therapy session. I believe my experience in therapy allowed me to recognize the signs in myself that warranted immediate attention. I would not recommend only relying on this method for self-help. But sometimes saving a life can be as simple as making a phone call.

Along with the National Suicide Hotline, SAMSHA, NYC Well, and NAMI are also valuable options for individuals looking for free hotlines. Most hotlines also provide 24/7 crisis support via text. Accessibility, flexibility, and confidentiality make text lines like Remedylive ideal for many users. There are also text therapy services like Better Help and Talk Space that differ from helplines by providing consistent access to clinicians of your choice. These services aren’t free. However, they are a worthwhile investment for those interested in 24/7 messaging options and live video messaging.

Family/friends/loved ones

While this may seem like an obvious resource, some including me, need the reminder that loved ones can and will show up for you in times of crisis if you allow them too. I often am of the mindset that my problems are for me to resolve alone. I’ve always felt uncomfortable with vulnerability and the prospect of falling apart at the seams for family members and friends to watch in horror. But especially in dire situations, your loved ones want nothing more than to be there for you. Give them the chance to prove themselves as a viable support system before you count them out. If you’re like me, someone who rarely calls on others when dealing with panic attacks or breakdowns, loved ones will appreciate you placing trust that level of trust in them. But of course, there are always exceptions which is why I also stress the benefits of helplines.

Support/Wellness groups

 While they aren’t as easily accessible or available 24/7 like helplines, having the opportunity to supplement therapeutic sessions with support groups can be a crucial part of healing. Many of the aforementioned helplines, like NY Project Hope have accompanying support and wellness groups. From the widely recognizable Alcoholics Anonymous fellowship to BFRB groups such as ImaniBFRB and Hope for BFRB’s, support groups can provide community, safety, and an ability to grow alongside others with similar stories. Like helplines, many support groups operate at a local level so be sure to search for organizations that serve your specific community.

Self-Care

Self-care can act as an effective second line of support while you await therapy sessions. Journaling, meditating, and practicing mindfulness are lauded by therapist as effective coping strategies. Escapist activities such as exercise, watching tv or simply indulging in the things you enjoy are more than appropriate. Alone they may not be enough so it’s important to invest in yourself through whatever therapeutic approach best suits you. But whatever keeps you grounded and can bring you back from whatever you’re experiencing is important to have ready in your arsenal of self-care. What coping mechanism or strategies do you most often tap into when in times of mental crisis? Feel free to reply in the comments!

For all the resources listed above and more please check out my Resources Page